Madness from Beyond the Mountains
adventurotica:

Spotlight on: Sky Pirates of the Rio Grande
Eden Kane is just a lowly clerk with the Department of Hazardous Artifacts in 1867, but she yearns to be more.  When she sees an opportunity for advancement, she takes it.  And needing a helping hand, she frees Zenobia Santiago - a criminal tiger-woman who has been imprisoned for years.  Together they head West, braving dangers and villains, to finally seize the secret of the Sky Pirates of the Rio Grande.
This is part one of the ongoing Eden Kane Adventures, featuring steampunk warfare, airship wars, swordfights, dinosaurs, mad science, and lots of hot sexiness.
Read the First 10 Chapters for free!
Buy the Ebook!
Read the rave reviews:
Review by:  Barbara Collins  on May 21, 2012 :  Awesome book! Five stars for smut and pirate/steampunky/mutant goodness! Seriously, this is a fun book with a well designed world that makes you want to explore it yourself, never mind just follow the characters around. There’s gritty details and blisteringly hot sex. Even the villains are hot. Maybe especially the villains are hot. Totally worth the 2.99.
Review by:  Tanilen  on Sep. 14, 2012 :  Wow…what more could one want from a book then hot sex, pulse pounding adventure, engaging characters, villains and heroes with swashbuckling panache, a low low price, *and* it’s well written? Why can’t more erotica be like this? While most authors seem content to charge you 2.99 for little more than flash fiction (by that I mean short short stories of less that 6k words), Paul Batteiger serves up a full size, hell, plus-sized novel for the same price. I can’t wait to read more novels from Adventurotica line.
And more…

Hey look guys, I’m a reviewer! That’s me up on top! Woo hoo!
Also, buy EVERYTHING these folks write. Totally worth it.

adventurotica:

Spotlight on: Sky Pirates of the Rio Grande

Eden Kane is just a lowly clerk with the Department of Hazardous Artifacts in 1867, but she yearns to be more.  When she sees an opportunity for advancement, she takes it.  And needing a helping hand, she frees Zenobia Santiago - a criminal tiger-woman who has been imprisoned for years.  Together they head West, braving dangers and villains, to finally seize the secret of the Sky Pirates of the Rio Grande.

This is part one of the ongoing Eden Kane Adventures, featuring steampunk warfare, airship wars, swordfights, dinosaurs, mad science, and lots of hot sexiness.

Read the First 10 Chapters for free!

Buy the Ebook!

Read the rave reviews:

Review by: Barbara Collins on May 21, 2012 : starstarstarstarstar
Awesome book! Five stars for smut and pirate/steampunky/mutant goodness! Seriously, this is a fun book with a well designed world that makes you want to explore it yourself, never mind just follow the characters around. There’s gritty details and blisteringly hot sex. Even the villains are hot. Maybe especially the villains are hot. Totally worth the 2.99.

Review by: Tanilen on Sep. 14, 2012 : starstarstarstarstar
Wow…what more could one want from a book then hot sex, pulse pounding adventure, engaging characters, villains and heroes with swashbuckling panache, a low low price, *and* it’s well written? Why can’t more erotica be like this? While most authors seem content to charge you 2.99 for little more than flash fiction (by that I mean short short stories of less that 6k words), Paul Batteiger serves up a full size, hell, plus-sized novel for the same price. I can’t wait to read more novels from Adventurotica line.

And more…

Hey look guys, I’m a reviewer! That’s me up on top! Woo hoo!

Also, buy EVERYTHING these folks write. Totally worth it.

dduane:

youknowyourebritishwhen:

Brace yourselves!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!!!

And the punchline is that her Maj was MUCH TOO SMART to sit on it. We know nothing good comes of that thing.

dduane:

youknowyourebritishwhen:

Brace yourselves!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!!!

And the punchline is that her Maj was MUCH TOO SMART to sit on it. We know nothing good comes of that thing.

dbvictoria:

Shakespearean insults, with cats.

7 more here.

Period LOLcats!

naamahdarling:

marionjravenwood:

zombres:

rivailleackerman:

Fangirl Challenge || 1/5 Male Characters: Ardeth Bay
The Mummy (1999) & The Mummy Returns (2001)

Goddamn, why was he not cast in literally EVERYTHING after this?

(Don’t answer that honestly, we all know why.)

In my fan group, Ardeth is simply referred to as “Oh, HIM.” Because yeah, that guy. OMIFUCKINGOD. Main character totally chased the wrong guy. *Whimper*

naamahdarling:

adventurotica:

Come check out the trailer for our new book!  Come see the campaign and stick around!

Hi!

My husband and I are running an Indiegogo campaign to fund our erotica novel, The Forbidden Island, a high adventure porn romance.

Why should you care?

I’m disabled — bipolar II and panic disorder — and cannot work.  The government money doesn’t even cover our mortgage.  I’m on meds and nutritional supplements to manage rosacea and IBS that Medicaid refuses to pay for, and which run about $200 a month.  Basically, this is our only source of income besides EBT and SSDI, and our expenses outweigh our income.

You should also care because it will be awesome.

In 1773 Lord and Lady Blackwood, along with their daughter Hannah, sailed into uncharted seas and vanished, leaving behind only their youngest daughter, Cecily, barely out of infancy.

Now, fifteen years later, Cecily is grown and seeks to solve the mystery of her family’s disappearance.  She sails into the same mysterious corner of the Indian Ocean in search of the same island her father sought - the Forbidden Island.

There she will face danger, mystery, pirates, lust, and the secrets of a lost civilization, as she tries to unravel what happened to her parents, and what has become of her sister.

So please, if you’d be kind enough to help out, please go take a look.  You can donate any amount, and you don’t have to take a perk.  We have some fun perks, though, including guest appearances, and a custom pirate pony.  (I customize My Little Ponies.  More on that later, or on request.)

If y’all could reblog, that would be fantastic.  This is seriously how we get by, and it’s still close to the edge.

Here’s the link again!

BEST SMUT EVER! Go LOOK at it. It’s not free, but it’s damn cheap, and they never miss a post.

donskoi:

my mother just sent me this photo and I

BEST MOM EVER!

donskoi:

my mother just sent me this photo and I

BEST MOM EVER!

mererecorder:

Serpentine by Nimbus2005

THIS is why I don’t go ice fishing.

mererecorder:

Serpentine by Nimbus2005

THIS is why I don’t go ice fishing.

s-intent:

guidetrainlove:

One that maintains a conversation record.YES FUCKING PLEASE

And doesn’t eat messages.

YES!

s-intent:

guidetrainlove:

One that maintains a conversation record.

YES FUCKING PLEASE

And doesn’t eat messages.

YES!

ka-kang:

Avengers(Tarot)

The Hierophant: Phil - Chiron
The Sun: Thor - Apollo
The Magician: Tony - Mercury
Strength: Steve - Herakles
The Hermit: Bruce - Cronus
The Lover: Natasha&Clint - Aphrodite&Adonis
The Devil: Loki - Pan

WANT!!

Anna Jarvis spearheaded the first Mother’s Day events in 1908 to honor her own mother, a Sunday School teacher and caregiver for wounded soldiers during the Civil War. From that point on, she campaigned zealously for the holiday to become official and in 1914, Congress recognized it as such. Quickly, the floral and greeting-card industries became enraptured with the commercial possibilities of the holiday. By 1920, disgusted by the onslaught of remunerative avenues, Jarvis began urging people to stop buying flowers and cards for their mothers. In a press release, she wrote florists and greeting card manufacturers were “charlatans, bandits, pirates, racketeers, kidnappers and termites that would undermine with their greed one of the finest, noblest and truest movements and celebrations.” She went door-to-door collecting petitions to rescind Mother’s Day and spent the rest of her life trying to abolish the holiday she founded.

The Inventor of Mother’s Day Disowned the Holiday, and So Should We All - Nicole Russell - The Atlantic (via dduane)

I always hated Mother’s Day. It is cheap and commercial and my mother worshipped at its altar. (And all the other lame holidays, too). It is a guilt trip and Hallmark-fest that will never go away because who could vote against it? 

Maybe I hate it a bit because I couldn’t have kids. I feel left, out, especially since I’m technically old enough to be a grandmother (which sounds like more fun than being a mother) and people ask about my damn kids. 

I mean, I miss Mom, crazy as she was. Or rather, I miss her from before she developed emphysema and Rheumatoid, when she could garden and drive herself around and make us all crazy. (She had depression issues). In a good mood, she could be fun to have around. I liked some of the things she shared with me. I like gardening and going to yard sales and flea markets. I don’t miss the guilt trips. 

So what did I do on mother’s day? Well, I went to yard sales this weekend and bought a bunch of junk and some useful stuff. Then I went out and did gardening, bought some of her favorite flowers (Fuschia and pansies). She’d have loved this house and the gardens. Mind you, I love Fuschia and pansies (she called them ‘Little faces’).

I hate the commercialism. I’m not sure I totally hate the holiday.